A Word So Strong...HATE, but I Feel It

Ok...am I allowed to vent a little?? Of course I am, this in my blog.

Here I go.

I HATE this disease. I HATE it with such a passion. I HATE the fact that I see loved ones dying from it, my children suffering from it. I HATE it.
Why my kids. What are the chances that Brandon and I would meet and us both be CF carriers and no one else in our family have it or even know what it even is. I HATE it.
"Why us?" I ask a lot of the time. Why is it that we were chosen to have not one but 2 with this disease? I have to always remind myself that God knows we can handle it, and we have, but why?

WHY?

Why this disease whatsoever? What is the point of it? Why put so many innocent children's lives ( and I know adults too) at risk. All I see is children dying. I am pissed. I am hurt, I am mad for all the families that have lost their loved ones.

My kids are ok and I thank God everyday that they are. Maybe an extra antibiotic or two and extra treatments, but why mine Lord?

I HATE this disease.

Dear God,
I thank you for trusting Brandon and I with these 2 children of yours and trusting us enough that we will take care of them. I thank you Lord that you have kept them out of the hospital thus far this year, but it hurts to see other people go through loss. Please. DEAR GOD, just protect my children and keep them healthy. We trust you and have faith in you. Please be with all the ones I know and don't know and offer them comfort in any type of loss or trouble they may be going through. I know you are poweful. Just give the researches/doctors the knowhow Lord and bless us all with a cure. Not just some with a rare gene or certain type of gene, but everyone completely. Please Lord God Almighty, just protect my/YOUR children.
In Jesus' name, Amen.

My love goes out to all those who are fighting. Young and old. May you know that the Lord is watching over you and will protect you and give you peace.

Still, in the end in my heart, I HATE this disease.