Monday, March 14, 2011

I get Down You Lift Me Up-Audio Adrenaline

My Son Has Made Me Better

My son, Hunter, is a tue gift from God. I feel like he is trying to teach me things when it should almost be the other way.
We danced to the songs, "I Can Only Imagine", and "Lifting Me Up" tongiht and we had the BEST time dancing and praising God in our living room.
I know I posted the song of "I Can Only Imiagine" before but will post the other one too. I guess I already did LOL. He knows the words to these songs. All of them, from going to church and listening to Christian music on the radio. All the songs...are rocker songs. LOL My babie...my little mini me. That's how I was. I'm so proud of him and so glad it's with Christian than the crap I listened to when I was younger.
All is good with us. Hunter goes in for his physical this Thursday for his sinus surgery next Friday. I know God is with us. I KNOW He is. No doubt. I can't even begin to explain how Hunter has helped ME with the walk with God. It took a child of God's to show me what is most important in life. Hunter has been more of a blessing for Brandon and myself than anything. He's a believer, no doubt. He's been touched by God himself I believe.
So, I had my important appointment and all is good with me. Praise the Lord!! Lots of praying and praising in this house.
If something comes in our way, we will tear it down with the power of God. He is the almighty one, and we are not afraid of anything, because we have HIM!!
All's good though. We pray for our family and friends and hope all is well. Love evryone.
If there's anything that I've learned from my kids (and yes usually it's the other way around, but you'd be surprised) it's live life every day as if it's your last. Trust God, believe and have faith. Turn it all to HIM.

Love my Lord and Savior, my family and my friends.

I get Down You Lift Me Up-Audio Adrenaline

Saturday, February 26, 2011

Signs...In more way than one--You Won't Believe This

Ok... to start out I want everyone to know that we are doing ok. A lot of appts. coming up not only for Hunter, for his sinus surgery, but an appt. to make sure mommy is ok as well.
Hunter has his surgery on March 25 and I have an important appt. on March 12.
But this is all on a different note.
We ordered tonight on tv the movie Paranormal 2. Once they got to the point of a ouigie board and the youngest sons name came up Hunter, we turned it off. There goes $5. Oh well!!
If anyone knows me, the house we lived in before, had "something" in it. We moved into an old farm house, where we were the first renters after the mom had past away in that house. This isn't it.
Around the day we moved in, there was something "weird" sbout the house.
After about 6 months to a year living in that house, I was trying to buckle Serenity into her car seat, Hunter was still in the house. As I was leaning over into the car, I felt 3 taps on my back. 3 taps. As I was still trying to get Ren into her seat, I was yelling at Hunter to get back into the house and I would get him in next. I go to turn around after buckeling her in, and Hunter was in the house the WHOLE time.
Second thing, I had happen and hubby was there for that. It was 2am and Brandon got up to check on the kids and they were asleep sound in their beds. I was already up and we go to lay back down, and all of sudden we hear this pounding on our door...at 230/3am in the morning. We are able to look out our upstairs bathroom to our back door, and NO ONE was there. A hard pounding/banging that would wake you out of your sleep.
The other thing that happened to me was, I was going to throw out garbage at night one night at like 6pm. I stop dead in my tracks and hear this voice, plain as day, "No, not now." What the hell is that supposed to mean????
A lot happened at that house. I can say that my hubby never doubted me one minute. I think it was the 3am pounding on the door made him believe me, I don't know.
We have since moved but watching this movie tonight, it was $5 worth losing. Having the name Hunter in it, and the things that were happening, we had to just turn it off.
Spirits do exist. I don't have an explanation. They just do. I believe that. Being that we believe in God and so strong in our faith, we moved, and are in a better house right now.
That house was wrong. Beautiful....yes. But, it came with circumstances. We didn't know it at the time and just chalked it up to an old farmhouse in the sticks with things that "may" have happened. But the taps on my back were so real and I honestly thought it was Hunter. I KNOW I heard a voice, "No, not now" and don't understand that and don't want too at this point. You never know what the history is, even though I checked on it, and nothing showed up. You never know the history.
My husband will never doubt me or nor will I ever doubt him.
Believe in what you believe. I believe in God. And God wanted us out of that house and we are. Happy. Go with your feelings. Know that God is there to protect you in anything.
The signs are there if you are willing to see them.

Monday, February 14, 2011

CF SUCKS

So, I have not been on in a while here posting, nor Facebook. I have been going through so much lately that I feel like I am just so mad and angry at CF. More now than ever.
Hunter has been having issues with his sinuses for so long. Antis that have been presribed for the past have usually taken care of the stuffy nose thing. Nothing coming out when he blows it, no other symptoms, nothing. So, last Friday we took him into the ENT to finally figure out what has been going on. Hunter, since last October has been on antis every month for his sinuses. Nothing's worked. He had a CT scan of his sinuses on Friday and was told to call today to get the results. I did, first thing I did this morning. I called and the nurse says, "I will have to have the Dr. call you." My question then was, "What's going on?" She said " It's showing severe sinus inflammation and the Dr. will call you today to let you know what to do." "Um, okay."
4:00 came and I called them again. I told the nurse to make sure the Doc gets this message as well as the other one because I WANT answers.
So the Dr. calls back at 4:30 and says that Hunter has sinus disease which is basically saying sinus inflammation. He said that he has so much inflammation (gunk) in his sinuses under his eyes that the best thing to do would be surgery. My heart dropped. He said being his past and antis not working previously, that this would be the best option. It would be an incision, for under his eyes, where all the gunk is at. He said it's like us doing CPT on his lungs for the mucous but the mucous is in his sinuses. What the hell is going on.
Hunter has always been so healthy when it came to CF as is Ren. This is something that I know may be minor to some, but major to me. I hate CF. It's just one more thing that I feel CF is trying to control, and it WON'T!
Rens on another anti for this persistant cough that she has. I just want CF to go away already. Please, God, just take the CF away.
Going to be strong for Hunter during this time, although, I want to cry and punch the friggen wall at the same time. But, I HAVE to stay strong.
The nurse is going to call in a couple of days to set the appt up for his surgery. Outpatient, should only take a couple of hours and will be able to go home. Thank God for that.
Prayers. Simply said...we need your prayers.
I always tell the other mommas to stay strong but now I have to take my own advice.

Friday, February 4, 2011

MercyMe - I Can Only Imagine

My friends, every single one of you, please listen to this song. It is one of my FAVORITE songs. I wonder would it would be like when the day comes to dance with Jesus with all my loved ones. Can you imagine that?? I can only imagine. I love every single one of you and God IS GREAT. He's the reason we are here. My heart belongs to you God. Forever and always. <3<3

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

My Oh My!

So, a lot has happened since the last time I posted. My little girl turned 4 on January 12, I had to go to the Dr. for this burning, excruciating pain in my stomach. Turns out I have gasteritis. Did labs and now find out it was indeed an ulcer. Gee, I wouldn't know why I would ever get one of those. Stress maybe...um yeah. So anyways, on this medication PrevPack for a month to kill off the bacteria in my tummy. It is 4 pills in the morning and another 4 at night. 2 different types of antis, a prevacid pill. Hunter goes, "Look Mommy!! You have the same pill I take!" It was funny.
So, then yesterday we had to trek it up to Childrens for their normal clinic visit. Being that this is a rescehduled appt, not by my choosing, we got stuck with a time of 8am. Now, living 2 hours way, we had to leave at 5:15am to be up there in time. We ended up getting there 15 mins. early. PFTs went great. Hunters FEV1 is 93%. Better than the 85 we got at our last visit. Appt. with the Dr. herself went really well. We thought the kiddos would have labs yesterday, due to being Vit D defficiant, but they are waiting until the next clinic visit in May. Whew!! Hunter is at 79 pounds now and Ren is at 46 pounds. They are growing beautifully. Thank God.
Then this morning I wake up and I was getting severe stomach cramps. I mean severe. I called the Dr. and he changed me from Prevacid now to Nexium.
Then Friday, we have to go to an SSI meeting at 2 for Hunter to get his case reviewed. Fun fun. They were wanting statements, wages, everything, dated back to November 2009. Considering I am anal about filing and everything having it's own folder, I had everything that they are asking for. If I'm not somewhat organized, I don't function well at all. I'm nervous about this though, I don't know why. Everything's in order. I'm thinking it's because we moved and switching banks and all that stuff. I don't know.
Just a lot of stuff going on. I try to relax, God knows I do. But, if I do, something will be missed or something won't get done when it needs to be. I'm trying though.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Please, Please Lord give me a break!!

Starting yesterday morning I have felt this pain in my upper abdomen. A fullness and it hurts. So much has been going on these past few months, that I actually think I may have an ulcer. NEVER had one before in my life. I don't know what to do. Can't afford to go to the Dr. until Friday, if it's not any better, with the copay and meds I know he is going to prescribe, so I just have to wait it out and pray it gets better. I'm tired and just want this to stop. Stress starting in October has brought me down to a level where I think it's effecting my health. If it's not one thing it's another. It's a constant of being stressed and I don't know how to deal with stress. My hubby tells me, maybe yoga. Not a good time to think of that. I'm sorry, I just want something to help me at the moment. Not really into the whole yoga thing.
Ren has been having a consistent cough since Friday and it was today that I called up to her Dr. to get something prescribed for her. She is now on Bactrim...again. I hate this. I really do. I wish these kids could get "sick" without antis and Drs and everything but it's not that easy when the have CF. Whatever we have to do. That is another reason, why I have to wait to go to the Dr. myself. EVERYTHING is spent on these kids and I wouldn't have it any other way, don't get me wrong. I think I am just run down sometimes. Homeschooling, treatments, meds, "normal" mom stuff and wife duties. I would rather them be at home and me deal with this than go to school and every other week have a problem like before.
Hunter is doing well though. I almost feel he is taking advantage of me not feeling well, and dangit...it's not fair. It's not just him, it's Ren too. They just don't want to listen, ever. I can talk to them but it's like they look at me and blow it off. I've just had it. So tonight it's a "Family talk" night with daddy and Ren especially, is NOT looking forward to it. Maybe it's because I am home all day, every day with them. Daddy does something and puts something in them (fear) that they do NOT like. It's all talking, don't get me wrong, but it's the way he comes across that I don't.
Not too much of a post right now as I am not feeling so hot, but thought I needed to update. I pray that if I have an ulcer, that it's not bad and will just go away. I don't know if it will without going to the Drs. I don't want to spend $60 to go. I would rather use that and buy food for the next week. I'm just stubborn like that. But I know that I am everything to these kids and without me, it wouldn't function. So, I need to take care of myself, I know. I just pray I get better before Friday.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Josh Groban - You Raise Me Up

Always so beautiful. An amazing talent he has. I was listening to this on the radio while kiddos were eating lunch. My kiddos stand up and raise their hands, as in, Praise the Lord.

Monday, January 3, 2011

You Never Let Go - song by Matt Redman

Through God All is possible. Without God nothings possible. Sit back and listen. Listen to the words. I LOVE this song because it reminds me that I am not alone no matter what I may be going through. God is Here. He's waiting for YOU to trust Him. Put everything you have into Him.